In case you didn't know this about me, I take great delight in bathroom and frat-boy humor. I have the mind (and therefore, the maturity, at times) of a 7th grader. I quote lines from movies like Austin Powers and Anchorman on a fairly regular basis and I'm often the one reminding everyone around the restaurant table to add the words "in bed," to the end of the proverb in the fortune cookie. (Really, it makes it taste better, I think). As a matter of fact, Jake and I ordered Chinese from our favorite take-out spot the other night after Ella's party and they gave us four fortune cookies (maybe they assumed by the amount of food we ordered that there should be 4 people partaking but actually, we just love ourselves some noodles and fried rice). We opened three of them, but unfortunately, they said truly profound things like, "you love the color white.." or "happy is the man with much toilet paper.." The point is, they weren't worth reading, nor adding on the fun ending. I saved the other fortune cookie for later but then forgot all about it until today.
Today, I was about to toss the entire cookie, unopened, in the trash can when I decided I should at least open it up to see what wise words awaited me today. And there it was, probably one of the most coherent sayings I've ever read post egg-roll: "Strong and healthy is the individual who asks for help when he needs it."
It's probably nothing more than a coincidence, but I did find it to be very timely on a day I consider a victory if I keep my head above water. Toys and leftover party decorations are strewn across the floor and boxes are waiting to be packed in preparation to move in less than a month. (P.S. I HATE clutter). Ella decided to decorate my favorite pair of pants with a bright orange crayon. I'm also slightly jarred by the realization that I'm still waiting to cross that threshold from "adjusting" to life with two kids to actually "managing" life with two kids. (I'm not sure I'll ever master it). Milo still has trouble taking a bottle and prefers me and only me. My parents have just moved back in town which, overall, is a good thing, but I'm finding that it implies a somewhat delicate balancing act between Kristin the wife, Kristin the mommy, and Kristin the daughter. Lots of change happening in a short amount of time. Lots of change happening for someone who doesn't like change. So if it's true that God shows up disguised as our every-day lives, then perhaps he was also tucked very neatly inside the fortune cookie I almost threw away, and the reminder was very simple: stop trying to be strong for everyone. Stop being sorry that you can't do it all. Let go, just a little bit, and you'll be better for it.
So later this afternoon, I made an executive decision: I called my sitter and asked her if she was available to take both the kids tomorrow for me. I'm not sure at what point in my life I decided that strength meant never asking for help, but I do know that being a mother is proving to be the most effective way of breaking that mentality. So tomorrow, help is coming in the form of a manicure/pedicure and maybe even a nice, long nap, if I'm lucky.
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