I'm slightly aware that this next statement may make me sound like a borderline alcoholic, but I promise that's not the case. Truly, one of the hardest things for me about being pregnant is the restriction of alcohol. There I said it. (What, you thought I was going to say sciatica? That sucks too, but in a different way). I've found that giving up the nightly glass of wine doesn't seem so difficult in the first trimester since nausea and alcohol don't tend to mix well anyway. But once I cross the threshold into the golden second trimester and began to feel like myself again, my self starts to remember how good my favorite bottle of Cabernet tastes. I look longingly at the shelves of wine in the grocery store and have found myself enviously eyeing the couple splitting a bottle at my favorite local cafe. (I stop staring just short of drooling and making an ass of myself). Anyone who knows me knows that wine is my drink of choice. I made weekly trips to the local wine shops- usually with Ella in tow- tasting wines and usually coming home with a few bottles in order to stay stocked up. A glass or two of wine each evening was the norm in our household and I looked forward to date nights with Jake where we would pop in a DVD, put our feet up and crack open a bottle. As preggos, it's bad enough that we're sick for 14 weeks straight during the first part of our pregnancy, and then we're faced with our changing bodies and fluctuating weight, but it only adds insult to injury when we're out with friends and have to watch them enjoy their adult beverages as we sit and sip our Shirley Temples. It's utter torture sometimes.
But truth be told, I live very comfortably in moderation camp. Every woman has to choose what's right for her and her baby in terms of what she allows herself to do while pregnant and it's a personal decision. I felt okay about drinking an occasional glass of wine when I was pregnant with Ella, starting around my 5th month up until she was born. I know that some would flame me for that, and of course, they're entitled to their opinion. In keeping with that, I also never ascribed to the "no deli meat" while pregnant. Because if I lived according to that, then I would have to obey the "no soft-serve ice-cream" rule. (No DQ when you're pregnant?? That's just silly). And then if I didn't do that, I wouldn't be able to be around any chemicals at all. While I don't walk around with my nose jammed into a jar of rubber cement, I did paint most of Ella's nursery during my 2nd trimester, (with latex paint and in a well-ventilated room), got my hair highlighted on a couple of different occasions and even used self-tanning lotion that my OB had approved. I guess I came to my own conclusion that pregnancy is tinged with enough worry and concern for me- everything from Down's screenings to spina bifida testing to gestational diabetes and so many other developmental concerns- that if I had to make myself worry whether the peanut butter cup blizzard I had just devoured was possibly contaminated by a dirty machine carrying lysteria, I would have had to check myself into the funny farm.
Coming from someone who considers herself to be a chronic worrier, it seems there's so much more to worry about in pregnancy now than there was even 20 years ago. I do value and appreciate where modern science and technology has brought us, but I can't decide whether it has actually created a culture of fear more than one of safety. Has it hurt more than it's helped? The answer to that is different depending on who you ask. I'm sure if I was considered a high-risk pregnancy, my answer to that would be a lot different than it is now. I have been lucky to not have to deal with some of the pregnancy complications that others face. But if there's one thing I do well (not that I'm proud of it), it's worry. Especially about things that I have no control over. So I try to live my life while pregnant as normally as I would when I'm not, with some obvious precautions and exceptions. I do eat deli meat, but usually heat it to steaming first- a good middle ground. I try to get plenty of sleep (and with a 14 month old, that proves to be difficult at times). I avoid ice cream, not because of the lysteria threat, but because of my lactose intolerance this pregnancy. (I had a Chic-Fil-A milkshake about once a week in my last month of pregnancy with Ella and it was usually the highlight of my week). I have had a glass of wine or two since being in the second trimester, and will probably continue to have one glass of wine per week. I met up with a good friend last night who is 31 weeks pregnant with her 2nd. We went to a local wine shop to do a tasting and proceeded next door to a wine bar and ordered a glass at the bar. Needless to say, a few eyebrows were raised, but we had a great time and I really enjoy that I'm not feeling as uptight about things this time around. Pregnancy is a special time in a woman's life, and thus, should be treated with respect, but it's not a disease. It's not a perpetual "no-no list" but a heightened awareness of your own personal intuition about you and your baby. My momma gut hasn't let me down in the past and I continue to trust it.
And so the count-down continues. 24 weeks, 3 days, or approximately 171 days, until this baby gets here and then of course, I'll have a whole new set of worries. But among the many things I'm looking forward to post-pregnancy, being able to crack open a bottle of wine while fixing dinner and then share it with the hubs is one of the top ten, for sure. If absence does, in fact, make the heart grow fonder, then my heart is growing quite fond of wine, soft cheeses and ice cream. ;)
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