One of the things I love most about our new house is that it has a front and back yard- with GRASS. Those who know us and have been to our last house know that our yard was, well, hardly a yard. We were good at growing weeds and our grass was best described as "ground cover." We bought the house as a starter home with plans to be in it for about three to four years and then put it on the market sometime between our first and second baby.
But the economy wouldn't have it that way. And as it turns out, Milo followed Ella by a close 20 months and I wasn't in any shape- physically or mentally- to try and move while pregnant. So nearly five years after we first moved in, my rambunctious daughter was confined to a deck and a small area of dirt behind it. After Milo got here, we finally decided that we just couldn't put off moving any longer. I was so desperate for Ella to have a yard to run around and be a kid in that I told Jake our next house could quite literally look like the Haney place on Green Acres as long as it had a decent back yard for her to run around in.
Turns out, we have an awesome backyard and a great house. We feel extremely grateful for both. But there have been several times in the past 2 weeks when I've found myself wanting more. Not necessarily a better or bigger house, or even a better or bigger backyard. But more...STUFF. I've been in the throes of brainstorming, decorating, and essentially re-doing every room in our house. (Ah, Pinterest, how I love thee). Milo now has his own room and moved into Ella's crib, therefore inheriting her dresser and other furniture. Which meant Ella needed "big girl" furniture, which meant spending more money. We now have a formal dining room...which, of course meant we needed a dining room table and chairs (and right now, we can still only seat four people at a time. Sorry, everyone else will have to get their Kabuto on and sit on the floor Japanese-style). Then there was a new kitchen table and chairs. Then oops- our old bedroom furniture wouldn't fit up the narrow back staircase. Voila! New bed and dresser for our bedroom. New sectional sofa for the living room. We haven't even begun to tackle area rugs, wall decor, art and new window treatments. I now refuse to let myself go on Etsy because of the 11 items currently in my cart that I can't purchase all at once because whadyaknow, we're not made of money after all.
I have no reason to wallow and every reason to be thankful. But for every minute I'm thankful, there's another minute not far behind it when I'm thinking, "I want....we need..if only..." My tunnel vision prohibits me from seeing everything we already do have. And then Ella comes up to me with her bright pink ball and says, "Mommy, go outside and kick the ball?" So I stop unpacking, stop playing decorator, stop thinking that our house would be just a bit more perfect if I could go ahead and buy that armoir I saw listed on Etsy...and we go outside to run around in our yard, our yard with GRASS...and I watch the sheer delight wash over her face as she runs around, giggling and squealing. This is all she wants. Even though it's a new house and new surroundings, as long as Mommy, Daddy and Milo are here, her world is okay and she's perfectly content.
So somewhere between two and twenty nine, we trick ourselves into believing that having more means living more. Having better stuff means living better. And sometimes, it takes running around barefoot in your backyard to bring everything back into focus. :)
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